Believe

Peel away your layer of fear; allow yourself to be rebirthed in love; watch as you blossom like a lotus flower with your petals open wide and seeking sunlight from above; as you climb each vista during your journey, regardless how steep or angled, find joy in the exploration and searching your soul in places high and seemingly inaccessible for nourishment. You can get there! BELIEVE!!

I’m sitting today with monkey mind. My ego is trying to protect me from my own fear.  I’m letting go of so many old “dances” (patterns) that no longer serve me as I move forward fulfilling my dreams. Happiness surrounds me and yet I struggle to let go completely.  Why? Have you ever wanted to let go of something with every fiber of your being? I know holding on only keeps me from the very thing I desire so this should be simple, right? RIGHT!!

Sitting with my son this morning  reminds me the of the world’s simplicity.  He went to sleep crying last night because his stuffed Pluto the dog went missing.  I knew it was in the house and we’d find it, but he was crushed not to have him at bedtime.  Marc and I searched for an hour until we found Pluto hiding behind a TV from an earlier game of hide & seek with our son.  Pluto made it to bed, but not before Eli fell asleep. My heart hurt having him go to sleep so upset.  My heart  believed Pluto would be found at some point…and he was.

I’ve felt this feeling (inability to let go) in the past like the time I struggled to let go of a boyfriend.  We didn’t fit anymore and yet I allowed myself to stay a long time afraid to move on.  Once I made the break, I felt freedom like I hadn’t felt in years.  My spirit soared and I embraced my life.  Less than 6 months later I met my best friend and soul mate, Marc,  now my husband.  I believed.

So today, why am I struggling? Am I really holding on or am I trying to control my own process of letting go?  I want it over and done.  Next!While I am letting go of that old stuff, it is coming out of me in a way  I easily handle and manage within my life.  I do not have to be PERFECT at this, nor do I need to control it.  I continue believing and allowing and I let go. The tears of letting go roll down my face and my smile widens with each tear.  I am safe and I believe. 

Thank you for letting me share my struggle with control and letting go with you.

Lovingly Lotus